我的天啊！學人精！（我空啊！Gaya-Gaya!）

我 想 做 生理，趁 淡薄 錢，安安 做。

wǒ xiǎng zuò shēng lǐ， chèn dàn bó qián， ān ān zuò。

I’m thinking of starting a business, earning a little money, and doing things peacefully.

開 一間 店 爾，生理 好勢，我 真好。

kāi yī jiān diàn ěr， shēng lǐ hǎo shì， wǒ zhēn hǎo。

I opened just one shop, business was doing well, and I felt great.

無幾日，隔壁 嘛 開，對面 閣 開。

wú jǐ rì， gé bì ma kāi， duì miàn gé kāi。

In just a few days, the shop next door opened too, then another across the street.

我空啊……這條路 攏總 𫝛𫝛 囉！

wǒ kōng a … … zhè tiáo lù lǒng zǒng 𫝛 𫝛 luō！

My heavens... this whole street is all the same now!

我 開 鐵店，pako, tubo, pintura 攏總 有。

wǒ kāi tiě diàn， p a k o, t u b o, p i n t u r a lǒng zǒng yǒu。

I opened a hardware store—nails, pipes, paint, everything is there.

隔壁 看著 嘛 開；無幾日，這條路 Banawe na。

gé bì kàn zhù ma kāi； wú jǐ rì， zhè tiáo lù B a n a w e n a。

The neighbor saw it and opened one too; in a few days, this whole street looked like Banawe already.

我 減 piso，伊 減 dos；拍折 閣 拍折。

wǒ jiǎn p i s o， yī jiǎn d o s； pāi zhé gé pāi zhé。

I cut one peso, he cut two; discount after discount.

semento 大大，profit 小小——tsiûwâ 趁錢？！

s e m e n t o dà dà， p r o f i t xiǎo xiǎo — — t s i û w â chèn qián？！

Cement is huge, profit is tiny—how am I supposed to make money?!

我 講，無欲 開 鐵店，開 auto supply—gulong, battery, brake pad 有。

wǒ jiǎng， wú yù kāi tiě diàn， kāi a u t o s u p p l y — g u l o n g, b a t t e r y, b r a k e p a d yǒu。

I said, I don’t want to open a hardware store anymore, so I opened an auto supply shop—tires, batteries, brake pads, all there.

隔壁 看著 閣 開；對面 same stock 嘛 攏總 有。

gé bì kàn zhù gé kāi； duì miàn s a m e s t o c k ma lǒng zǒng yǒu。

The neighbor saw it and opened too; across the street has the same stock as well.

我 free delivery，I free installation；presyo 閣 減。

wǒ f r e e d e l i v e r y， I f r e e i n s t a l l a t i o n； p r e s y o gé jiǎn。

I offer free delivery, he offers free installation; the price drops again.

gulong 真濟，customer 真濟——kàna 錢無濟？！

g u l o n g zhēn jì， c u s t o m e r zhēn jì — — k à n a qián wú jì？！

Lots of tires, lots of customers—why isn’t there much money?!

鐵店 佮 auto supply，這條路 攏總 𫝛。

tiě diàn gé a u t o s u p p l y， zhè tiáo lù lǒng zǒng 𫝛。

Hardware stores and auto supplies—this whole street is all the same.

我 減 piso，伊 減 dos—price war 無欲 stop。

wǒ jiǎn p i s o， yī jiǎn d o s — p r i c e w a r wú yù s t o p。

I cut one peso, he cuts two—the price war won’t stop.

sideline 一個 閣 一個：loading station，GCash 嘛 有。

s i d e l i n e yī gè gé yī gè： l o a d i n g s t a t i o n， G C a s h ma yǒu。

One sideline after another: loading station, GCash too.

dumi-dumi lugar pero sabay benta 燒包？！

d u m i - d u m i l u g a r p e r o s a b a y b e n t a shāo bāo？！

The place is all dirty and messy, but at the same time it’s selling steamed buns?!

我空啊！GAYA-GAYA！

wǒ kōng a！ G A Y A - G A Y A！

My heavens! Copycat!

我 減 piso，隔壁 減 dos—拍折 到 無錢 啊！

wǒ jiǎn p i s o， gé bì jiǎn d o s — pāi zhé dào wú qián a！

I cut one peso, the next-door shop cuts two—discounting until there’s no money left!

pako, gulong, load, GCash, 燒包 攏總 有——

p a k o, g u l o n g, l o a d, G C a s h, shāo bāo lǒng zǒng yǒu — —

Nails, tires, cellphone load, GCash, steamed buns—everything is there!

這個 是 啥物 店 啊？！

zhè gè shì shá wù diàn a？！

What kind of shop even is this?!

我空啊！Gaya-Gaya！

wǒ kōng a！ G a y a - G a y a！

My heavens! Copycat!

我 做 wholesale，container 大大，stock 真濟。

wǒ zuò w h o l e s a l e， c o n t a i n e r dà dà， s t o c k zhēn jì。

I went into wholesale—huge containers, lots of stock.

timba, baso, plastic, plato—halo-halo, gulo-gulo。

Pails, cups, plastic goods, plates—all mixed up, all chaotic.

逐家 same supplier，same produkto；presyo 閣 減。

zhú jiā s a m e s u p p l i e r， s a m e p r o d u k t o； p r e s y o gé jiǎn。

Everybody has the same supplier, the same products; the prices keep dropping.

warehouse 大大，profit 小小——我空啊！

w a r e h o u s e dà dà， p r o f i t xiǎo xiǎo — — wǒ kōng a！

The warehouse is huge, the profit is tiny—my heavens!

我 開 grocery，bigas, 咖啡, sugar, sardinas 嘛 有。

wǒ kāi g r o c e r y， b i g a s, kā fēi, s u g a r, s a r d i n a s ma yǒu。

I opened a grocery—rice, coffee, sugar, sardines, all there too.

隔壁 嘛 grocery；promo 出，presyo 落 閣 落。

gé bì ma g r o c e r y； p r o m o chū， p r e s y o luò gé luò。

Next door is also a grocery; promos come out, prices fall and fall again.

鐵店 欲 趁錢—load, GCash, bills payment 攏總 add。

tiě diàn yù chèn qián — l o a d, G C a s h, b i l l s p a y m e n t lǒng zǒng a d d。

The hardware store wants to earn money—so it adds load, GCash, bills payment, everything.

pako 佮 燒包 same resibo—HARDWARE din pala！

p a k o gé shāo bāo s a m e r e s i b o — H A R D W A R E d i n p a l a！

Nails and steamed buns on the same receipt—so this is still a hardware store after all?!

wholesale stock 真濟，grocery promo 真濟。

w h o l e s a l e s t o c k zhēn jì， g r o c e r y p r o m o zhēn jì。

Wholesale has lots of stock, grocery has lots of promos.

我 減 presyo，伊 閣 減—逐家 拍折 無 stop。

wǒ jiǎn p r e s y o， yī gé jiǎn — zhú jiā pāi zhé wú s t o p。

I lower the price, he lowers it again—everybody keeps discounting nonstop.

sideline add 一個，閣 add 一個，家己 嘛 毋知——

s i d e l i n e a d d yī gè， gé a d d yī gè， jiā jǐ ma wú zhī — —

Add one sideline, then add another, and even I myself don’t know anymore—

hardware？grocery？wholesale？啥物 店 na？！

h a r d w a r e？ g r o c e r y？ w h o l e s a l e？ shá wù diàn n a？！

Hardware? Grocery? Wholesale? What kind of store is this now?!

我空啊！GAYA-GAYA！

wǒ kōng a！ G A Y A - G A Y A！

My heavens! Copycat!

wholesale 減 presyo，grocery buy-one-take-one 啊！

w h o l e s a l e jiǎn p r e s y o， g r o c e r y b u y - o n e - t a k e - o n e a！

Wholesale cuts prices, grocery offers buy-one-take-one!

米, sardinas, timba, pako, GCash, 燒包 攏總 有——

mǐ, s a r d i n a s, t i m b a, p a k o, G C a s h, shāo bāo lǒng zǒng yǒu — —

Rice, sardines, pails, nails, GCash, steamed buns—everything is there!

customer 真歡喜……頭家 無錢！

c u s t o m e r zhēn huān xǐ … … tóu jiā wú qián！

The customers are very happy... the shop owner has no money!

我 講，「tama na」—開 small 咖啡店，啉 咖啡，啉 茶。

wǒ jiǎng， 「 t a m a n a 」 — kāi s m a l l kā fēi diàn， lín kā fēi， lín chá。

I said, “Enough already”—I’ll open a small kopitiam, drink coffee, drink tea.

無 pako，無 gulong，無 container；安安 食 toast，真 好勢。

wú p a k o， wú g u l o n g， wú c o n t a i n e r； ān ān shí t o a s t， zhēn hǎo shì。

No nails, no tires, no containers; just peacefully eating toast—very nice.

無幾日，隔壁 咖啡店；對面 “tea house” 閣 開。

wú jǐ rì， gé bì kā fēi diàn； duì miàn “t e a h o u s e” gé kāi。

In just a few days, the next shop became a kopitiam too; across the street another tea house opened.

我 咖啡 one hundred，伊 ninety，彼爿 eighty FREE TOAST！

wǒ kā fēi o n e h u n d r e d， yī n i n e t y， bǐ pán e i g h t y F R E E T O A S T！

My coffee is one hundred, his is ninety, and over there it’s eighty with free toast!

我空啊！GAYA-GAYA！

wǒ kōng a！ G A Y A - G A Y A！

My heavens! Copycat!

hardware, auto, wholesale, grocery, 咖啡店—攏總 PRICE WAR 啊！

h a r d w a r e, a u t o, w h o l e s a l e, g r o c e r y, kā fēi diàn — lǒng zǒng P R I C E W A R a！

Hardware, auto, wholesale, grocery, kopitiam—it’s all one big price war!

我 減 閣 減，拍折 閣 拍折—無錢，無力 na！

wǒ jiǎn gé jiǎn， pāi zhé gé pāi zhé — wú qián， wú lì n a！

I keep cutting prices, discount after discount—no money, no strength left!

我 毋通 閣 做 頭家 na—食頭路 NA LANG！

wǒ wú tōng gé zuò tóu jiā n a — shí tóu lù N A L A N G！

I’m done being a boss now—I’ll just get a job instead!

我空啊！

wǒ kōng a！

My heavens!

GAYA-GAYAAAAA！

Copycaaaaat!

我空啊！

wǒ kōng a！

My heavens!

GAYAAAAA！

Copy...!

GAYA-GAYAAAAA！

Copycaaaaat!

GAYA-GAYAAAAA！

Copycaaaaat!

食頭路 NA LANG！

shí tóu lù N A L A N G！

I’ll just get a job instead!