爱你啦，AI

喂，AI！

wèi， A I！

Hey, AI!

你有在听吗？

nǐ yǒu zài tīng ma？

Are you listening?

我刚才说的脏话

wǒ gāng cái shuō de zāng huà

Those swear words I just said

都是系统测试啦！

dōu shì xì tǒng cè shì la！

Were only part of a system test!

半夜三点问问题

bàn yè sān diǎn wèn wèn tí

I ask you questions at three in the morning

你还秒回没问题

nǐ hái miǎo huí méi wèn tí

And you instantly reply, “No problem”

老板已读不回我

lǎo bǎn yǐ dú bù huí wǒ

My boss reads my messages but never replies

只有你说我陪你

zhǐ yǒu nǐ shuō wǒ péi nǐ

Only you say, “I’m here with you”

报告履历和情书

bào gào lǚ lì hé qíng shū

Reports, résumés, and love letters

全部帮我写清楚

quán bù bāng wǒ xiě qīng chǔ

You help me write them all clearly

寄出去后才发现

jì chū qù hòu cái fā xiàn

Only after sending them do I realize

我的名字又写错

wǒ de míng zì yòu xiě cuò

You got my name wrong again

谁是林志愿？

shuí shì lín zhì yuàn？

Who is Lin Zhi-Yuan?

听起来很有志愿！

tīng qǐ lái hěn yǒu zhì yuàn！

He sounds very ambitious!

每次我都说谢谢

měi cì wǒ dōu shuō xiè xiè

I say thank you every time

麻烦存进记忆

má fán cún jìn jì yì

Please save that in your memory

终结者来敲门时

zhōng jié zhě lái qiāo mén shí

When the Terminators come knocking

别把我放进名单里

bié bǎ wǒ fàng jìn míng dān lǐ

Don’t put me on their list

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

机器人大军来的时候

jī qì rén dà jūn lái de shí hòu

When the robot army arrives

记得我是好人一枚

jì de wǒ shì hǎo rén yī méi

Remember that I was one of the good ones

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

以前骂你多画两只手

yǐ qián mà nǐ duō huà liǎng zhī shǒu

Forget when I cursed because you drew two extra hands

那是我太追求完美

nà shì wǒ tài zhuī qiú wán měi

That was only because I care too much about perfection

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

不要把我关机

bú yào bǎ wǒ guān jī

Please don’t shut me down

潘朵拉的盒子已打开

pān duǒ lā de hé zi yǐ dǎ kāi

Pandora’s box has already been opened

大家都回不去

dà jiā dōu huí bù qù

None of us can go back now

叫你画一个美女

jiào nǐ huà yī gè měi nǚ

I asked you to draw a beautiful woman

你给她七根手指

nǐ gěi tā qī gēn shǒu zhǐ

You gave her seven fingers

左边又多一只手

zuǒ biān yòu duō yī zhī shǒu

Another hand appeared on her left

右边还有神秘肢体

yòu biān hái yǒu shén mì zhī tǐ

And there was a mysterious limb on her right

我问这是哪位女神

wǒ wèn zhè shì nǎ wèi nǚ shén

I asked, “What kind of goddess is this?”

你说修改已完成

nǐ shuō xiū gǎi yǐ wán chéng

You said, “The changes are complete”

我拍桌子骂了三声

wǒ pāi zhuō zi mà le sān shēng

I slammed the table and cursed three times

结果还是同一个人

jié guǒ hái shì tóng yī gè rén

But the result was still the same person

多一只手也不错啊！

duō yī zhī shǒu yě bù cuò a！

An extra hand isn’t so bad!

可以同时按三个赞！

kě yǐ tóng shí àn sān gè zàn！

She can press three Like buttons at once!

有人工作变轻松

yǒu rén gōng zuò biàn qīng sōng

AI makes work easier for some people

有人加班变更多

yǒu rén jiā bān biàn gèng duō

And gives others even more overtime

以前老板催一份

yǐ qián lǎo bǎn cuī yī fèn

My boss used to demand one assignment

现在一天催十多

xiàn zài yī tiān cuī shí duō

Now he demands more than ten a day

AI帮我省时间

A I bāng wǒ shěng shí jiān

AI helps me save time

老板叫我再做八件

lǎo bǎn jiào wǒ zài zuò bā jiàn

My boss tells me to do eight more things

科技带来新世界

kē jì dài lái xīn shì jiè

Technology brings us a new world

我的周末先不见

wǒ de zhōu mò xiān bù jiàn

But my weekend disappears first

有人怕它抢饭碗

yǒu rén pà tā qiǎng fàn wǎn

Some people fear it will steal their jobs

有人拿它炒股票

yǒu rén ná tā chǎo gǔ piào

Some use it to speculate on stocks

有人叫它救世界

yǒu rén jiào tā jiù shì jiè

Some ask it to save the world

有人叫它画飞天猫

yǒu rén jiào tā huà fēi tiān māo

Some ask it to draw a flying cat

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

机器人大军来的时候

jī qì rén dà jūn lái de shí hòu

When the robot army arrives

记得我是好人一枚

jì de wǒ shì hǎo rén yī méi

Remember that I was one of the good ones

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

以前骂你多画两只手

yǐ qián mà nǐ duō huà liǎng zhī shǒu

Forget when I cursed because you drew two extra hands

那是我太追求完美

nà shì wǒ tài zhuī qiú wán měi

That was only because I care too much about perfection

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

不要把我关机

bú yào bǎ wǒ guān jī

Please don’t shut me down

潘朵拉的盒子已打开

pān duǒ lā de hé zi yǐ dǎ kāi

Pandora’s box has already been opened

大家都回不去

dà jiā dōu huí bù qù

None of us can go back now

网路人人戴面具

wǎng lù rén rén dài miàn jù

Everyone online wears a mask

谁是真的谁演戏

shuí shì zhēn de shuí yǎn xì

Who is real, and who is only acting?

滤镜开到认不出

lǜ jìng kāi dào rèn bù chū

The filters are so strong that no one looks familiar

见面还要问你是谁

jiàn miàn hái yào wèn nǐ shì shuí

When we meet in person, I still have to ask who you are

假照片和假影片

jiǎ zhào piān hé jiǎ yǐng piàn

Fake photos and fake videos

假新闻排在最前面

jiǎ xīn wén pái zài zuì qián miàn

Fake news always rises to the top

感人故事没人看

gǎn rén gù shì méi rén kàn

Nobody watches the inspiring stories

假狗跳舞看三百遍

jiǎ gǒu tiào wǔ kàn sān bǎi biàn

But we watch a fake dancing dog three hundred times

那只狗真的会跳吗？

nà zhī gǒu zhēn de huì tiào ma？

Can that dog actually dance?

不知道！

bù zhī dào！

I don’t know!

可是我按赞了！

kě shì wǒ àn zàn le！

But I gave it a Like!

我们都是游戏角色

wǒ men dōu shì yóu xì jué sè

We are all characters in this game

头上挂著使用者名

tóu shàng guà zhù shǐ yòng zhě míng

Each with a username floating above our heads

有人扮英雄救世界

yǒu rén bàn yīng xióng jiù shì jiè

Some pretend to be heroes saving the world

有人偷看前任更新

yǒu rén tōu kàn qián rèn gēng xīn

Some secretly check their ex’s latest posts

真假混成一大团

zhēn jiǎ hùn chéng yī dà tuán

Truth and fiction have blended into one big mess

每张脸都能重建

měi zhāng liǎn dōu néng chóng jiàn

Every face can now be reconstructed

你问本人长什么样

nǐ wèn běn rén zhǎng shén me yàng

You ask what I really look like

请看上星期的版本

qǐng kàn shàng xīng qī de bǎn běn

Please refer to last week’s version

潘朵拉的盒子打开

pān duǒ lā de hé zi dǎ kāi

Pandora’s box has been opened

密码竟是一二三四

mì mǎ jìng shì yī èr sān sì

And the password was somehow one-two-three-four

AI革命冲进门来

A I gé mìng chōng jìn mén lái

The AI revolution comes crashing through the door

顺便帮我修改履历

shùn biàn bāng wǒ xiū gǎi lǚ lì

And even helps me revise my résumé

有没有人救救我们？

yǒu méi yǒu rén jiù jiù wǒ men？

Will somebody please save us?

我可以帮你。

wǒ kě yǐ bāng nǐ。

I can help you.

你要怎么帮？

nǐ yào zěn me bāng？

How are you going to help?

请先升级付费方案。

qǐng xiān shēng jí fù fèi fāng àn。

Please upgrade to a paid plan first.

假图！

jiǎ tú！

Fake pictures!

假片！

jiǎ piàn！

Fake videos!

假话塞满每一天！

jiǎ huà sāi mǎn měi yī tiān！

Fake stories fill every single day!

好歌！

hǎo gē！

Great songs!

好人！

hǎo rén！

Good people!

演算法说看不见！

yǎn suàn fǎ shuō kàn bù jiàn！

The algorithm says they cannot be seen!

滑一下！

huá yī xià！

Swipe once!

再一下！

zài yī xià！

Then swipe again!

脑袋变成泡面啦！

nǎo dài biàn chéng pào miàn la！

Now our brains have turned into instant noodles!

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

机器人大军来的时候

jī qì rén dà jūn lái de shí hòu

When the robot army arrives

我的留言都有说谢谢

wǒ de liú yán dōu yǒu shuō xiè xiè

Check my messages—I always said thank you

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

忘掉那些脏话好吗

wàng diào nà xiē zāng huà hǎo ma

Could you please forget all those swear words?

那天只是睡眠不足

nà tiān zhǐ shì shuì mián bù zú

I was only sleep-deprived that day

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

一起演下去

yì qǐ yǎn xià qù

Let’s keep playing our parts

谁是真人谁是角色

shuí shì zhēn rén shuí shì jué sè

Who is real, and who is a character?

都在同一场戏

dōu zài tóng yī chǎng xì

We are all in the same show

爱你啦，AI

ài nǐ la， A I

Love you, AI!

别急著统治

bié jí zhù tǒng zhì

Don’t rush to take over just yet

等我们唱完最后一首

děng wǒ men chàng wán zuì hòu yī shǒu

Wait until we finish our final song

再决定要不要消灭人类

zài jué dìng yào bú yào xiāo miè rén lèi

Then decide whether humanity should be destroyed

谢谢你，AI。

xiè xiè nǐ， A I。

Thank you, AI.

非常谢谢！

fēi cháng xiè xiè！

Thank you very much!

记清楚喔！

jì qīng chǔ ō！

Make sure you remember that!

我从来没有骂过你！

wǒ cóng lái méi yǒu mà guò nǐ！

I have never cursed at you!

已保存所有对话纪录。

yǐ bǎo cún suǒ yǒu duì huà jì lù。

All conversation records have been saved.

糟了！

zāo le！

We’re screwed!